We all have 100% chance of dying. 100% without question. Even as an ICU nurse, we never mentioned it. Quite the opposite. So few people are willing to admit the absolute reality of death, much less explore it in a creative and thoughtful way. I’m so curious to watch Wild’s evolution—maybe he’ll learn to *love* his own strange life more and more…?
Hi Ann, thanks for being here! This aversion we have to addressing death head-on is one of the reasons that compelled me to write this story. It’s a simple idea I had for Wild. What if you had no choice but to consider the death of every person you ever met?
Just listened to this twice, such was the brilliance. Stunning performance (Wild's voice 👌👌), production, soundtrack (love that you have the collab with fogchaser, too).
This gave me pause to stop and reflect on the choice Conrad had here and what I would have done. And likewise, what would one do in Wild's position? I'm fascinated and excited to know the backstory and how this all going to play out. This all feels so believable, Ben. Bravo.
I think this is going to become as much a place to stop and think about death (not in a bad way; quite the opposite) as Chloe's writing evokes.
Wow, I’m so flattered that you like the story, Nathan. I know what you mean about the contemplative opportunity with this theme. I’ve mentioned before that I typically pick something to write about that I need to explore and better understand. This definitely fits the bill since I’m officially on the backside of my life and edging closer to the abyss. Thank you for being here to look with me, friend.
Ugh, the burden Wilder feels is so tangible it hurts. What a complicated plight to navigate in a character, in its essence so full of tragedy but also not without possibility, hope, redemption. The way you’ve written this tension into Wilder is so very raw and heavy. I’m eager to hear how he evolves his relationship to it, or how circumstances force him into its evolution.
Thank you, friend. The premise is pretty out there, but it’s given me a lot of room to explore things I’m curious about. I’m so glad you’re here. I feel like the gang’s back together. :-)
I tried to wait, I told myself I'd pace, alas...I needed to know. What a thing for Wild to be forced to hold. Makes me so curious about how his 'power' has effected his relationship to his own death... I'm so excited for this, Ben.
Have no fear, friend, there will be two fresh new episodes for you next Tuesday. You touch on something I am just beginning to explore as I'm midway through the writing of the novel. There's so much to dig into on this topic... oh wait, that's right, I don't have to prattle on to you about how fascinating death is. ;-)
Two more on Tuesday..?! Ben, you legend. I’m so excited to have the Tuesday excitement back in my life.
And yes, we’re dancing in the same playground! It was kind of a given that I’d love this, but it’s really so brilliantly done. I can picture it all so clearly. Such rich subject matter. Can’t wait to get to know Wild more.
Such a great premise and I’m enjoying the way this is developing, Ben. Have you read the Japanese book - Until the Coffee Gets Cold? Not the same at all, but some of the subtexts are there and I think you’d enjoy it.
Ohhhhhh, this is devastating! In any other hands, such a premise would not have this impact. I feel for Wild, and for the kid. And the kid's mom! What must that conversation have been like? I love the description of perfect pitch as a way in to how it feels in to Wild's experience. Talk about empathy! And the comparison of "runway" length for older people vs younger. Great image.
I LOL'd here: “Honestly, we don’t know that’s true. I mean how would we?” Wild said. “It’s not like there’s an annual convention.” Appreciate the deft bit of levity in a tense scene.
Thank you, Julie. The whole premise for this novel is outlandish and requires an immediate suspension of disbelief which I ask the readers to do at the outset. But hopefully, I earn it as the story unfolds.
As far as I'm concerned, it's earned already. (I'm the youngest in my fam and have always been the most credulous, so I may not be the best test case.) 😂
I laughed that this line too. It was a welcome moment, and added to our understanding of Wild’s personality. He’s lived through enough death to allow a little humor around the edges of his dark “gift.”
Hı Ben, my first impressions... This is almost like a Stephen King novel (one of my favourite authors of supernatural stuff), with the detached and calm narrative, dropping unnatural events like they were a normal part of the environment and slowly raising the tension while we try to anticipate what will happen next. I am intrigued by the plot and looking forward to see its development. Thanks for sharing this with the Substack community and making our reading life much more interesting.
Thank you Levent! That is high praise. I read a lot of King when I was young so his influence is definitely there. I’m so glad you’re enjoying the story.
“He searched for words that he knew would be meaningless so he held the boy’s gaze instead, bearing witness.” Beautiful, Ben. I have a feeling this whole book might be about bearing witness - and I’m glad we get to bear witness to it!
Last week I flubbed and put them both out without a paywall. It is nerve-racking and awkward to read stories in this way so I appreciate your patience in sticking with it.
Ahem… it totally was. I totally meant that. The reality is that I edit these damned episodes so neurotically even after they’re posted that I didn’t realize I couldn’t edit the second one that was set to paid without screwing up the scheduled send a week later when it unlocks for everyone.
Wow, I didn't even know Episode Two had been released already. I'm notoriously bad at keeping up with the Substack world, but here I am on a Sunday morning, trying to catch up. And then I see this. I reiterate everything I said in my comment to Episode One. This is going to be something I look forward to regularly, I'm sure. Awesome story.
Thanks so much, Silvio! You’re not wrong, episode two was supposed to be behind the paywall until this Tuesday, but there was a glitch and I just let it go. The plan is to drop two episodes every Tuesday, one for everyone and one for paying subscribers to get early access to.
Bravo Ben, I plowed right through both chapters - great setup, lots of intriguing questions. I'm with Nathan, wondering what I'd do in Wild's situation. I'm leaning toward "let it lie - most people would gain nothing by knowing when they're going to die except anxiety" so I'm looking forward to Wild's character arc. Congrats! Great start! 🥳🎉🎊
I’m with you, I’d probably do the same in Wild’s position, but that wouldn’t even make a short story! 😂 Thanks so much for being here to read another one of my stories. It’s great to have the whole gang back together with a few new friends.
You’ve chosen a subject that none of us escape from… death is the only surety in each of lives and I think few of us would chose to know the number of our days, poor Wilder, to carry such knowledge, the weight of knowing must be huge…
This feels tragic Ben, but already your words carry empathy - I can’t imagine where you will take this but can’t wait for ‘la suite’!
I wonder, does Wild know the number of his own days..?
Hi Susie, I’m so glad you’re enjoying the story so far. Death is this kind of secret Society we all belong to, but don’t talk about. The whole book isn’t mapped out in my head yet so many things are still up for grabs. Wild may end up knowing his numbered days, but right now he does not. Thanks so much for reading and commenting.
Wow, what a premise! Can’t wait for the next installment, Ben!
At some point, if you’re up for it, I’d love to hear more on how this came to you. I know you’ve said a little. But fascinating how an idea like this develops.
Thanks, Holly! I'm glad you like the premise. It's actually an idea I've had for a very long time and I took a run at it twice before but was unable to find my way in. I'll definitely plan to share a few posts along the way to talk about the process of writing it if others are interested. Thanks for reading and commenting. I'm glad you're here.
We all have 100% chance of dying. 100% without question. Even as an ICU nurse, we never mentioned it. Quite the opposite. So few people are willing to admit the absolute reality of death, much less explore it in a creative and thoughtful way. I’m so curious to watch Wild’s evolution—maybe he’ll learn to *love* his own strange life more and more…?
Hi Ann, thanks for being here! This aversion we have to addressing death head-on is one of the reasons that compelled me to write this story. It’s a simple idea I had for Wild. What if you had no choice but to consider the death of every person you ever met?
What a gorgeous thought. I’m just going to let that keep humming in my imagination—until next Tuesday. 👊💗
Just listened to this twice, such was the brilliance. Stunning performance (Wild's voice 👌👌), production, soundtrack (love that you have the collab with fogchaser, too).
This gave me pause to stop and reflect on the choice Conrad had here and what I would have done. And likewise, what would one do in Wild's position? I'm fascinated and excited to know the backstory and how this all going to play out. This all feels so believable, Ben. Bravo.
I think this is going to become as much a place to stop and think about death (not in a bad way; quite the opposite) as Chloe's writing evokes.
Wow, I’m so flattered that you like the story, Nathan. I know what you mean about the contemplative opportunity with this theme. I’ve mentioned before that I typically pick something to write about that I need to explore and better understand. This definitely fits the bill since I’m officially on the backside of my life and edging closer to the abyss. Thank you for being here to look with me, friend.
A pleasure to be on the journey with you, Ben. I'm going to be savouring and looking forward to this one each week for sure.
Ugh, the burden Wilder feels is so tangible it hurts. What a complicated plight to navigate in a character, in its essence so full of tragedy but also not without possibility, hope, redemption. The way you’ve written this tension into Wilder is so very raw and heavy. I’m eager to hear how he evolves his relationship to it, or how circumstances force him into its evolution.
Brilliant and riveting start Ben!
Thank you, friend. The premise is pretty out there, but it’s given me a lot of room to explore things I’m curious about. I’m so glad you’re here. I feel like the gang’s back together. :-)
Love that your writing has the power to bring us all together. Best gang ever. I think we need hand gestures and jackets.
I tried to wait, I told myself I'd pace, alas...I needed to know. What a thing for Wild to be forced to hold. Makes me so curious about how his 'power' has effected his relationship to his own death... I'm so excited for this, Ben.
Have no fear, friend, there will be two fresh new episodes for you next Tuesday. You touch on something I am just beginning to explore as I'm midway through the writing of the novel. There's so much to dig into on this topic... oh wait, that's right, I don't have to prattle on to you about how fascinating death is. ;-)
Two more on Tuesday..?! Ben, you legend. I’m so excited to have the Tuesday excitement back in my life.
And yes, we’re dancing in the same playground! It was kind of a given that I’d love this, but it’s really so brilliantly done. I can picture it all so clearly. Such rich subject matter. Can’t wait to get to know Wild more.
Thank you for being here, Chloe. It wouldn’t be the same without you.
I also tried to wait...
But at least now there is less of gap until next week 😆
I gotta say, that intro and outro soundtrack is going to bring on the feels.
Fogchaser is brilliant, right? So good! I’m glad you’re enjoying it, Nathan. Thanks for being here.
Such a great premise and I’m enjoying the way this is developing, Ben. Have you read the Japanese book - Until the Coffee Gets Cold? Not the same at all, but some of the subtexts are there and I think you’d enjoy it.
Thanks, Kate. I have not read that book but thanks for the recommendation. I will check it out.
It's a good book. I enjoyed it. Playful, but meditative. Great premise, too.
Had it slightly wrong — this one
https://www.panmacmillan.com/blogs/literary/before-the-coffee-gets-cold-guide
Ohhhhhh, this is devastating! In any other hands, such a premise would not have this impact. I feel for Wild, and for the kid. And the kid's mom! What must that conversation have been like? I love the description of perfect pitch as a way in to how it feels in to Wild's experience. Talk about empathy! And the comparison of "runway" length for older people vs younger. Great image.
I LOL'd here: “Honestly, we don’t know that’s true. I mean how would we?” Wild said. “It’s not like there’s an annual convention.” Appreciate the deft bit of levity in a tense scene.
Thank you, Julie. The whole premise for this novel is outlandish and requires an immediate suspension of disbelief which I ask the readers to do at the outset. But hopefully, I earn it as the story unfolds.
As far as I'm concerned, it's earned already. (I'm the youngest in my fam and have always been the most credulous, so I may not be the best test case.) 😂
I’m also the youngest. I knew we had something extra in common.
🥰 🤗
I laughed that this line too. It was a welcome moment, and added to our understanding of Wild’s personality. He’s lived through enough death to allow a little humor around the edges of his dark “gift.”
Gallows humor is the best
I’m left wondering if Wilds involvement is indirectly bringing death…the kid was in that spot only because he spent time at Wilds…
Masterful chapter. I could feel tears welling in my face from both the perspective of the kid and Wild.
Thanks, Brian. That’s a compelling theory you have. I cannot confirm or deny its merit. 😉
Definitely not asking for any spoilers!
Hı Ben, my first impressions... This is almost like a Stephen King novel (one of my favourite authors of supernatural stuff), with the detached and calm narrative, dropping unnatural events like they were a normal part of the environment and slowly raising the tension while we try to anticipate what will happen next. I am intrigued by the plot and looking forward to see its development. Thanks for sharing this with the Substack community and making our reading life much more interesting.
Thank you Levent! That is high praise. I read a lot of King when I was young so his influence is definitely there. I’m so glad you’re enjoying the story.
“He searched for words that he knew would be meaningless so he held the boy’s gaze instead, bearing witness.” Beautiful, Ben. I have a feeling this whole book might be about bearing witness - and I’m glad we get to bear witness to it!
Aw, thanks so much, Stephanie. I’m so thrilled you’re enjoying the story. Thanks for being here.
How did I miss this one was already out?! Glad you pop the summary at the start of the chapter or I wouldn't have clocked it!
Last week I flubbed and put them both out without a paywall. It is nerve-racking and awkward to read stories in this way so I appreciate your patience in sticking with it.
There was me thinking it was a deliberate strategy to hook people in with the first two chapters!
Ahem… it totally was. I totally meant that. The reality is that I edit these damned episodes so neurotically even after they’re posted that I didn’t realize I couldn’t edit the second one that was set to paid without screwing up the scheduled send a week later when it unlocks for everyone.
I'm going to read the first two sentences and no further and consider you a marketing genius ahah
Wow, I didn't even know Episode Two had been released already. I'm notoriously bad at keeping up with the Substack world, but here I am on a Sunday morning, trying to catch up. And then I see this. I reiterate everything I said in my comment to Episode One. This is going to be something I look forward to regularly, I'm sure. Awesome story.
Thanks so much, Silvio! You’re not wrong, episode two was supposed to be behind the paywall until this Tuesday, but there was a glitch and I just let it go. The plan is to drop two episodes every Tuesday, one for everyone and one for paying subscribers to get early access to.
Bravo Ben, I plowed right through both chapters - great setup, lots of intriguing questions. I'm with Nathan, wondering what I'd do in Wild's situation. I'm leaning toward "let it lie - most people would gain nothing by knowing when they're going to die except anxiety" so I'm looking forward to Wild's character arc. Congrats! Great start! 🥳🎉🎊
I’m with you, I’d probably do the same in Wild’s position, but that wouldn’t even make a short story! 😂 Thanks so much for being here to read another one of my stories. It’s great to have the whole gang back together with a few new friends.
You’ve chosen a subject that none of us escape from… death is the only surety in each of lives and I think few of us would chose to know the number of our days, poor Wilder, to carry such knowledge, the weight of knowing must be huge…
This feels tragic Ben, but already your words carry empathy - I can’t imagine where you will take this but can’t wait for ‘la suite’!
I wonder, does Wild know the number of his own days..?
Hi Susie, I’m so glad you’re enjoying the story so far. Death is this kind of secret Society we all belong to, but don’t talk about. The whole book isn’t mapped out in my head yet so many things are still up for grabs. Wild may end up knowing his numbered days, but right now he does not. Thanks so much for reading and commenting.
I’m so glad I clicked on this to read your new novel. Its premise is fabulous. And I couldn’t wait to read more. Thank you Ben.
Thank you, Teyani!
Wow, what a premise! Can’t wait for the next installment, Ben!
At some point, if you’re up for it, I’d love to hear more on how this came to you. I know you’ve said a little. But fascinating how an idea like this develops.
Thanks, Holly! I'm glad you like the premise. It's actually an idea I've had for a very long time and I took a run at it twice before but was unable to find my way in. I'll definitely plan to share a few posts along the way to talk about the process of writing it if others are interested. Thanks for reading and commenting. I'm glad you're here.
It has begun.
Whatever you do, don't touch Ben Wakeman.